All posts tagged parenting

Pitfalls of Passive Parents (Part 2)

This is part two of Pitfalls of Passive Parenting. Click here to read part one. Passive Parents Focus on Behavior Modification Rather Than Heart Transformation—They are more concerned with minimizing embarrassment than with truly molding the heart. Eli wasn’t alarmed by the wickedness of his sons’ hearts. He was just embarrassed by their behavior and…

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Making God’s Will Less Confusing

Life is complex. God’s will isn’t. In fact, at any given moment, there’s a powerful question you can ask to determine if you are in or out of His will. It’s simply this: “Did I follow God to where I am right now?” The Holy Spirit will instantly resonate the answer in your heart—you will…

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The Pitfalls of Passive Parenting (Part 1)

Uncovering the assumptions and behaviors of disengaged parenting “It’s just a phase—he will grow out of it.” “That’s just what teenagers do—she’ll mature.” “All kids are this way—there’s not really anything we can do to change that.” “They have to be able to make decisions for themselves.” These and others are the statements we make…

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Defeating the Media Monster-Part 2

Media will eat your family alive unless you tell it not to! In part one we uncovered five challenges that modern media brings into our lives and homes. To beat the challenges, tame this monster, and prepare your children to have discernment and wisdom, may I make the following suggestions: 1. Build healthy relationships committed…

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Suggested Family Cell Phone Guidelines

Seems like kids are getting cell phones younger and younger these days! This post is one I’m only doing because of requests. Several years ago, as our boys became teens, we decided to get cell phones for them—primarily so we could get a hold of them in relation to school and youth group outings. It…

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New Research on Social Networking

Both TIME magazine and the San Francisco Chronicle recently reported on some dangers surfacing behind the many hours that teens are spending in social networking. Here are a few quotes from the San Francisco Chronicle article that relayed the results of a poll of 1,000 teens and 1,000 parents: “From behind their bedroom doors, more…

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Top 15 Questions Christian Teens Ask

Recently, I posted about our Q&A times with students at teen camps and retreats. Over the past five years, hundreds of questions consistently revolve around the same themes. If you are a parent or youth worker, this list might help you get into their heads. It is a general consolidations of hundreds of questions. Here are…

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The Power of a Question

Helping Others by Asking the Right Questions Not long ago I was on our church campus on an off day. As I left the building, headed home, there was an unfamiliar man taking photos of our buildings. Trying to be hospitable and also cautious, I approached him and kindly asked where he was from. He…

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Getting Teens to Air Their Questions

How an Honest Q&A Time Can Help Your Students This week we’ve been at teen camp with 275 of our teens from LBC. It’s been a great week! One of my favorite aspects of camp is something we instituted a few years ago called “Answers to Tough Questions.” It’s a one hour Q&A time before…

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The Top Ten Dating Mistakes Parents Make (Part 3)

How Parents Let Their Kids Go Too Far, Too Fast, Too Soon This is the final article in a series about the mistakes that parents often make in allowing their children to date too seriously too soon. We’ve seen the first seven, so let’s wrap it up… 8. They push their kids into dating out…

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Sweet Revenge on My 17 Year Old!

Stuff I’m Planning to Do to My Son’s Car—Now that He Has One! Well, I’m officially old! My seventeen-year-old son now has a car and this post is strictly for your comic relief! Lance worked hard and saved, and it was a joy to help get a car for him as a graduation gift. It’s a…

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The Top Ten Dating Mistakes Parents Make (Part 2)

How Parents Let Their Kids Go Too Far, Too Fast, Too Soon This is part two in a series of articles that flow from years of dealing with situations that arose out of well-meaning but short-sighted parental decisions. We all have blind spots, so these things are shared with a spirit of sincerity and humility…

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The Top Ten Dating Mistakes Parents Make (Part 1)

How Parents Let Their Kids Go Too Far, Too Fast, Too Soon This is the first in a series of three articles. Over the years, the Lord has allowed me the privilege to serve families and students in their journey together. Hundreds of teens have graduated from our student ministry, and the vast majority of…

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Does God Care What We Wear? (Part 3)

Why Have a Student Ministry Dress Standard In our last two articles we began considering the question, “Does God care what we wear?” Again, so many responded positively to these articles! In a day when sloppier and sleezier is finding its way into the church and the Christian home, may we reconsider clear biblical principles…

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Learning to Laugh With and At Each Other

A Little Helpful Insight from Our Family Antics Yesterday, a little after noon, we finally loaded up in the car and began our traditional, annual family trek to Northern California for Thanksgiving. We’ve made this trip eighteen times now, so we’ve gone from “middle-of the-night-driving” with kids in diapers to “middle-of-the-day-driving” with kids watching Buzz…

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Does God Care What We Wear? (Part 2)

Why Have a Student Ministry Dress Standard In our last issue we began briefly considering the question, “Does God care what we wear?” So many of you responded positively to this series of articles and I appreciate your feedback! In a day when sloppier and sleezier is finding its way into the church and the…

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Does God Care What We Wear?

Why Have a Student Ministry Dress Standard As a youth pastor I am often asked about dress standards—from teens, from parents, and from other youth leaders. Do we have a dress standard? What is it? How do we enforce it? Why do we have one? What about visitors? The questions and the reasonings sometimes seem…

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Mutations, Confusions, and Transitions Part Four

Helping Your Teen through Some of Life’s Toughest Years In the past few articles we have been considering the radical physical changes that all teenagers experience between the ages of twelve and twenty. In this article, I want to turn your attention to the emotional changes. First let’s discuss the symptoms. Have you seen your teenager…

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Mutations, Confusion, and Transitions Part Three

Helping Your Teen Through Some of Life’s Toughest Years In the past two articles we have begun discussing the radical changes that teenagers experience, and how parents and spiritual leaders should respond to those changes. In the last edition, we focused primarily on external physical changes—which are many. In these next few paragraphs we will…

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Mutations, Confusion, and Transitions Part Two

Helping Your Teen Through Some of Life’s Toughest Years In the last issue I introduced a series of articles that will highlight the changes that a teenager faces between the ages of 12 and 20, and how we as adults, youth workers, and parents should understand and respond to those changes. I want to reiterate,…

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